Slice of Life: Return to Dexter

Slice of Life Thursday

Return to Dexter

I have changed my font back to normal size because yesterday’s big letters looked ugly and unorganized so sorry if these small letters intimidate you. For those of you that don’t already know, I am a T.V. addict! Before you say, ‘everybody’s a T.V. addict!’ I once watched five-and-a-half hours of non-stop Prison Break. By non-stop I mean I didn’t stop for the bathroom, food or my family. In addition to that, that was on a school day…jealous much?

But now, there is a new element that has returned into my life, something I have locked outside in the cold long ago. That something is (dramatic pause) ‘Dexter’, the show not the ninth grader with the ‘wolverine’ chops (I call sideburns ‘chops). For those of you that don’t know, ‘Dexter’ is a show about the life of a serial killer…how can anybody not like that?

I -along with Vigan- am eagerly awaiting the premier of the fifth season. It debuts in three days. (YAY!!!) So forgive me if I do not attend school for the next few weeks. If only school could leave me be to get some real work done (by which I mean Dexter). It is constantly ruining my ‘eat, sleep, T.V.’ schedule. For example last night, I had to write my report on the chemical changes I noticed, study for Mrs. Culberson’s version of the ‘oh my freaking god test!’ and get at least an hours worth of Dexter under my belt.

Soon, I worry that I will have almost as much ‘no-life-li-ness’ as Vigan. Who has told me what happens at the end of season four- the one I am currently watching. So remind me to kill him tomorrow…Dexter is such a good role model for kids. That is another thing I have to put on my ‘why I hate Vigan’ list. If you want to know what is on the list, here it is :

1.) It is unimaginably annoying to have somebody say, “Guess what?” in a voice that leads you to believe that they are going to say something remotely intriguing and then saying, “BLACK OPS”. (The new Call of Duty game for those of you that lives).

2.) He said that Dexter is better than Prison Break…it IS NOT better than Prison Break. Ribs cant even to begin to compare to Prison Break.

3.) Like I have told you, he ruined Dexter season four! L

4.) He didn’t join my epic lunch table resistance. And my table resistance kicks-ass!

5.) He said ‘Hit Girl’ sucks. For those of you that don’t know (wow, I have said ‘for those of you’ four times so far in this post) ‘Hit Girl’ is that little purple haired girl from the movie Kick Ass.

6.) He is almost as annoying as the movie ‘Inglorious Basterds’ (it is the name of a movie and is spelt with an ‘E’ so it is not a bad word). I hated Inglorious Basterds!

I haven’t really ‘sliced my life’ yet, (slice of life is the name of Dexter’s boat…how awesome is that?) so here goes. I am going to describe to experience of watching Dexter for you boring people out there that haven’t seen it.

This is one-hundred percent true and two-hundred percent embarrassing. And just to throw it out there, I am in kind of a rush here because I have two episodes loaded on my laptop as I write this. I will probably have five before you read this. I was staring at the screen of my laptop, sweat forming on my hairline due to the sheer suspense despite the fact there were two fans operating in the room and it was seven o’clock so no heat from the sun was coming from outside. My fingers were tingling at the thought ‘will he get away, or will he be caught? When will the ‘trinity killer’ strike again. Will Dexter stop him?’ I almost let out a scream at one point…how embarrassing is that?

So there, my life can now consider itself sliced. I hope you enjoyed reading and I have embedded the preview for the fist season so if you want to watch it and see how good it is for yourself… watch it! NOW!!!!

P.S. I don’t mean any offence to Vigan. Ranting about him has become part of my blog-schedule.